And They Said….

slut-shaming
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That “high heels, a bit of skin, lots of boys that she calls friends and an attitude to kill” makes her what the world assumes to call her “slut” – defamed and derogatory. Slut remains predominantly female and a serious slur in society, the male counterpart being “stud” or even the flamboyant “playboy” and an occasional “casanova” – nothing derogatory, instead playful, joyous and of a certain fame! The literary meaning of a “slut” provided by the dictionary is “a woman who has many casual sexual partners” while that of a “stud” is “a young man thought to be very active sexually or regarded as a good sexual partner!” The parity therefore begins with the defining words itself. You may be a stud and flaunt it but it’s definitely not correct to be a slut! Choices be damned…

And they said that “high heels, some skin and lot of promiscuity” notwithstanding, sluts are generally sluts with reference to their power of choice, a choice which they do not dither to exercise in a world full of judgements. That’s where the power of a slut reverberates the corridors of the male bastion, frightening the hell out of their patriarchal system of being. The first connotation of the word “slut” was far removed from sexual overtures as it meant or denoted “”a woman of dirty, slovenly, or untidy habits or appearance” early as the first citation in the year 1402. The 15th century brought about brazen degradation in this word with the meaning being cited as “”woman of a low or loose character” and with prolific uses by great writers like Dickens in the late 19th century the derogatory connotations stuck on and “slut” became “the slut” – forever powerful for the wrong reasons. Or maybe for being able to exercise her right to choice, be it the high heels, the show of the skin or the sexual partners that she chose amongst many as would her male counterpart. The slut had garnered the power to break the male dominion of choice by making her choice, so rejoiced the reclaimers of this word with “Slutwalks” that were organised in many places, which seemed a bit misplaced though since the prerogative of these walks were more towards the “dress proper to avoid rape” kinda thought and statements made in Society. The female franchise of choice seemed to relegate a bit in all the skin that tended to surface in these walks. Nevertheless a message sent to the Society at large against cultural misconceptions that prevail throughout the world even in these modern times and in unimaginable spaces like the “New York Times” for instance where they reported  the gang rape of an eleven year old in Texas describing how the girl had dressed “older than her age and wore makeup!!” Did that make the 11 year old a slut or those gang of rapists studs? If she had dressed her age would there have been no rape? Why is it always a female who has to be appropriate in dress and behaviour before she falls below the standards set by this hypocritical Society? Why? Why? Why?

And the questions remained unanswered even in this new millennium filled with modernity, feminism, gender equality, women’s rights, empowerment and the works, the answer my friend is not “blowin’ in the wind” instead it lies trampled beneath the hubris of choices that the females cannot make and even if they do make their choice, it’s too strong for the liking of the world. Just look around you to see this deprivation at every instance and space occupied by women and those judging them both men and women alike. Artificial Intelligence rules the world, robots are replacing human minds, physical and mental boundaries have been broken, the world has become a global village yet women mix their alcohol with Coca Cola and wrap a napkin around their whisky glass atleast in our part of the world. While the opposite end of the spectrum still continue to tirade against the clothes women wear or don’t wear, what they drink or don’t drink and how they behave or don’t. If she walks out of a marriage that ain’t working, well she’s done that probably because she’s a slut…if she stays single and loves to party hard, she’s probably not getting hooked cause she’s a slut…if she’s showing some skin and flaunting her high heels and beautifully done make up, she’s probably, aah forget it she’s a slut man!! A slut that you don’t take home to mamma cause mamma’s (though being a women) is gonna judge her just like you did and admonish her pet peeved son to stay away from this sluty bitch. A recent report by the BBC on the perils of a married couple who got trolled for their sensual beautiful post wedding photographs that they uploaded on their private profiles on the internet gets even the more worse when the bride states that she was the one getting bashed more for it than her husband. She says, “It was really awful for me. They were harassing me much more than him. They were telling me to act in porn films, I was body shamed,” She had been “slutified” forever!!!

That this woman and the many more who make their choices and have the courage to stand up for these choices should not only be left alone but their choices should also be respected. She chose to be a slut, let her be cause “it’s perfectly fine to be a slut!!!”

And They Said……

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