We aren’t half as happy that the new year is almost here as we are about 2019 finally on the verge of being done and out. And before you blast us all as people with no attachment for the past and someone wanting to be bit too practical for our own good, let’s clear the air here and now. The reason why we are so hell bent on bidding 2019 an eager farewell is because we hope that the the end to this year will also end all of the weird atrocities that many of our favorite foods have been subjected to these past months.
Unless you have been living under a rock, you cannot absolutely miss what the days gone by had brought in feast for you. From milk maggi to chocolate cherry dosa and chicken doughnuts, 2019 is leaving our taste buds with a weird after taste. It is to cut out the weirdity and stick to the normal that we want 2020 to be here soon, sans all the fusion therein. But before bidding 2019 the final goodbye, here’s revisiting some such really outrageous food combos that we sure hope won’t be making a comeback anytime again-
What’s maggi without the tastemaker you say? The savior of a million growling hostelite tummies, the soulmate of more than just a bunch of good for nothing millenials, the ultimate indulgence for those daring to venture out of their diet, the peppy comfort food of the foggy winter evenings and the steaming bowl of instant deliciousness that is the salvation for all weary souls at the end of the day- there’s no way we can ever repay Maggi for the much craved spiciness it has forever been bringing into our lives. And then one fine day all of a sudden you are bombarded with some Maggi pics that isn’t the least like your favorite bowl of noodles. Enough to have us stop dead in our slurping tracks!
This might sound like a nightmare you wouldn’t ever want to visit but a plain- rather ‘sweet’ and simple bowl of Maggi really did much to make 2019 the year of lies. Sweet maggi caught the internet by storm when a video of maggi being cooked in milk and sugar went viral much to the disgust of maggi fanatics. Twitter immediately went berserk over this blasphemy and shunned this seeming disaster in unison.
We are thankful however that this meethi milky maggi does not at least have the masala- the outcome then would sure have made us shudder! On second thoughts however, maggi with milk and sugar shouldn’t be so bad- it might taste somewhat like vermicelli, we assume. I mean if we don’t have any problem with the sweet version of pasta, we sure shouldn’t be so biased against the sweeter version of Maggi as well!
Chocolate Cherry Dosa
It was only sometime that sweet maggi had somehow managed to subside in the public horror realm that there emerged another monster to rake up quite another ruckus. And the victim in question this time was our forever hearty and healthy dosa! Like we know we are benevolent enough people to let fusions work upon our staple fare. So there very much exists the chocolate dosa that while might not be the tastiest of things still does not bother us as much to deride it. But was there really any need to take steps deeper into hell and come up with something as disastrous as the chocolate cherry dosa????! We don’t think so, nor does the scores and tons of netizens who went all out of their way to shame- shame this utter abomination.
Gulab Jamun Vada Pav
The name might sound bizarre to even utter and that’s exactly what netizens felt when a certain gulab jamun vada pav debuted on the horizon some time back. Despite the clarity in the name though many were frantically hoping this wouldn’t exactly be what it sound like. But to the utter dismay of food enthusiasts, it indeed was their worst fears coming true. The spicy zing of vada pav and the sweet delight of gulab jamun- ruining it there and then for all, together!
Of course we wouldn’t tolerate such disrespect for two of our forever favorites. There’s no denying the crunch and spice that a vada pav with green chilli brings that satiates our every desire. Equivalently there’s no any happiness on earth that biting into soft, piping gulab jamuns bring. But spicy and sweet is a combo best reserved for chanas to munch with some tea and not for either gulab jamun or vada pav.
Expectedly therefore there weren’t many approving of this combo though we personally believe that given it’s just the jamun between the pav- sans the vada and the chili- it wouldn’t be any different than bread and sweets together. Not that it is particularly appetising but well we can atleast foresake the damage that might have been caused otherwise!
Gulab Jamun Ki Sabzi
Gulab jamun vada pav sounds way better than gulab jamun ki sabzi! I mean how do you slather such a revered sweet in spices and expect any one of us to eat it without any qualms? And this was exactly the adamance that netizens dwelled in when they found out about this bizarre dish. Turned out however that this is indeed very much a legit dish and the ‘gulab jamuns’ aren’t actually the ones that are the love of our lives. It’s more of some kofta incorporated in gravy that makes for this very misleading subzi. Delighted for once at least we are that this was just some misnomer!
Dosa Masala Burger
If the common man can be so daring, can our adventure feeding brands be left behind? No wonder then that on the bandwagon of dishing out weird fusion foods has jumped in a brand as iconic as McDonald’s for the sake of God knows what! And the offering on the menu this time is dosa masala burger! A burger that has the patty meddling in with some generous slathering of tangy rasam sauce, the dosa masala burger was supposed to be a lure exclusive for the Indian taste buds. And yet Indians all over the net shunned it with such outrage that we really don’t know if otherwise rich ol’ McDonald’s could manage to find some poor few takers!
Gulab Jamun Pizza
If you weren’t offended enough by pineapple on pizza, food unfanatics made a second attempt at getting on your nerves with gulab jamun pizza. Pizza is perhaps one of the most abused foods anywhere- with people putting anything and everything they can get hold of on those slices of deliciousness and ruining it sometimes while acing it on other occasions. Naturally gulab jamun pizza made both fans and enemies on net with some rejecting it outright while other were more than willing to give it a chance. Without the usual toppings however, we presume these gulab jamuns on pizza might actually be a pleasant surprise. I mean if you like gulab jamun cheesecake so much, then you sure oughtta give gulab jamun pizza a fair chance at least?
Fried chicken doughnut sandwich
When McDonald’s venture with its dosa masala burger it must have taken a cue from another equally iconic name KFC. With the fried chicken doughnut sandwich that KFC introduced in the market only some time back, the future of fusion foods suddenly started looking a lot more cluelessly exotic. Surprisingly though it did not create much of a furore which might be a relief for the brand. On the flipside though the lack of buzz might even spell bad news because it might mean that the really absurd combo did not find (m)any takers! Serves KFC right, wat say?!