Only women, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally, a man is only loved under the condition that he can provide something
Okay, I know Chris Rock wasn’t being the most genuine person ever on earth when he said something like this which however appears fundamentally true. Personally or not very personally, the men we know or the men in our lives aren’t just there because they ‘provide’ us with something every time or the other. Of course they do, but they are not expected to. At least not every time. And therein my friend lies a whole lot of difference- of which perhaps the world seems to be indifferent.
But even when I profess about how not completely rooted in reality this utterance of slight blasphemy is, it’s ironic that not many are aware of the importance of the day that the 19th of November encompasses every year. It might be callous indifference or the purported non- necessity of the occasion that today celebrates but it still is somewhat weird that we don’t as much as give a damn about what the day has in store for us. Folks, it’s International Men’s Day and while you might be taken aback by this revelation or choose to clamour less about this even when you are aware of it, the fact remains that the world is indeed not fair.
Arguing that men don’t really need a day to celebrate themselves because well, they do it all the time irrespective of whether they deserve it or not is as good an argument as one that’s non existent. Yep indeed, it’s male chauvinism that has forever been doing the rounds since times immemorial, there has been patriarchy striving to make lives more difficult for those unlucky enough to be biological deflectors rather than followers of the same. And yet this glorification of men by men themselves does not take anything away from the fact that they too deserve to be celebrated and it’s full well and even natural that they have a day dedicated to them.
But of course, merely blaming the world for such blatant show of hypocrisy that propagates everyone as equal while neglecting one over the other- or the other over another- is only laughable. Ask how many men know that today is the day they gets to be internationally celebrated and they will be like “Oh even we have a day?”. Like dude, you can’t expect to be lauded and exalted if you yourself are naive enough to take solace in your everyday existence. Of course a Men’s Day or even a Women’s Day for that matter is nothing to fuss about- it really is just another day that merely morphs the celebration of mankind in general under two distinct entities. But while for us people who have only been subject to such inconveniences and partialities that we can brush off or for whom freedom is so easy and righteous that we can easily choose to break away from the parlance of being a stoic soul and declare revolt, the significance of days like these lies in merely celebrating through food and fun, drinks and dates, it’s the people at the essence of the development of such days that require greater scrutiny.
Like not all women are damsels in distress, not also all men are dogs. Opinions will differ based on life experiences and observations and indeed mindsets but it is indeed true that there are men who can be weaker than some women. Either mentally or physically, familialy or culturally, men can be vulnerable. Just because their muscles have enough mass doesn’t make anyone liable to assume that they would be there to save you, no matter what. And trust me when I say that no sane being even expects them to. But it still is the prevailing notion of how men should be strong, of how they should show no tears, of how they shouldn’t be frail that ends up making them weaker than they really are.
Times are a-changing and they have been changing for long. And this isn’t anything very good; in fact this is something that should be deemed as normal. Because we all are humans, it doesn’t matter whether we are male or female when we have to experience emotions or display strength. The idea needs to be one of coexistence and it indeed has been. There have been malicious elements rearing their ugly heads every now and then to throw this balance out of gear. But the people of today are realising that in spite of how ‘inhuman’ they might be branded as they still harbour some empathy. Not to deny that chauvinism exists but it is also equally not true that no male is ever exploited.
It therefore allows us to take some offence when we hear such things as what comedian Rock perpetuates. Whether that be his observation or some personal experience, we sympathise that he has been subject to such instances that shaped up his notion. But otherwise, no one is celebrated anyway. Not every woman would ditch all men the moment they refuse to yield in to demands for their provision and yet not every man will be loved just like that. That’s indeed the state of affairs in the world, sorry or not, but it need not necessarily be every time. To Chris Rock therefore and to all other men in the world, you are not loved only when you provide something. You are as much dear to us as we believe we are to you. To manhood, to men and to all people who celebrate man because they are well, humans, Happy International Men’s Day. They deserve it, all the love and the fanfare and we too surely deserve them!