Springing a surprise in some selfishness

selfish gene psychology

Perhaps even the most selfish of all people in the history of the world too would not really take it in their stride if they are called by that name of what essentially has all the feels of the avoidable ingrained in it. Whether the disdain of it might be induced by a take on morality or otherwise worked out by simple understanding of its nature being not the most ideal of all adjectives to live in, being a selfish soul isn’t something anyone would like to identify as. In its almost culpable characterisation, this vicey aspect of human behavior is always advised against in its essence even when the very ground upon which selfishness comes to prevail is somewhat dubious in that there tends to be conflicting overlapping of a many other attributes of what necessarily finds expression through the human being in such reiterations of them that might appear as selfish in the first impression and not so much in a later moment. Largely condemned though, and in all apparent appropriateness as well is this tendency that characterise our nature at some point of time or the other but that which streams along more than a singular strand of being even when it is rarely cherished in the parallel running weaves of it.

Being selfish should be a character trait that is essentially avoided in all such conjuring of it that necessarily marks its traverse along a route infested with too much concern for the self. In such beliefs of holding that render it close to interpretation in utterly chided characteristics of narcissism or egocentrism, selfish as a way of life is best shunned. Because indeed, the inherent ideals of selfishness derive from such ideas that concern it exclusively and excessively with furthering the interests of the self regardless of the way such actions and behavior bear the potential to weigh down upon the existence and well being of others. And persisting along such lines of thought that look down upon selfishness as an immoral manifestation of the human essence are also such rather practical considerations of it that allude it to being not very conducive to one’s psychological well being as well. Tying it therefore to a more assertive spectrum of thought as palpable as one’s own dwelling in the mind accords selfishness again that status of which it is forever commanding but reimagined in such extents of striking reach that manifest indeed even greatly the absolutely vicey vibes emanating from this particular sphere of behavioural pattern.

Even without the scientific reference though, selfishness has more than enough references against it to be an eternal commander of the ill feels pertaining to it. Whether it be in numerous restating across the ages in adages and sayings and phrases or dwelling instead on alternative ‘theories’ to make its undesirability prominent by emphasising instead on the virtues of selflessness, the self centered disreputation is one universally agreed on. As a taboo therefore that needs to be prevented from making home in our psyche, that which needs to be thwarted the very minute there is even the slightest inkling of it taking over our nature, being selfish is seen as a character flaw that none wants to be remarkable in. Also, as an idea that is believed to be conflicting with the most essential exploration of what it means to be humane as humans, selfishness has been made to encompass such spectrum of thought that simply does not fit in with the ideal ways in which the psychology of humankind needs to be working, essentially with full regard to others. In hindsight therefore, as a certain forbidden strand of assertion of the human nature, selfishness is always something that should not be pursued or furthered and which in itself has come to be a doctrine so identified with by the human spirit that none of us fancy indeed to find expression in such terms that spell anything like the stinging shames of what selfishness spans across as. And it indeed is essential as well, this rebuke that the selfishness trait has earned given such appalling dimensions of its exploration that ekes it out as being one of the key elements across diverse understanding of criminal behavior, alluding further to its deglorified stance as a non virtue that calls for its absolute shunning.

And yet despite such prevailing line of its working in tremendous assertion and across all its rooting deep into the vortexes of the unvenerable, in every needless or needful defamation of it, selfishness still is as worldly an experience to not be effectively singled out as pure good or utter evil. Also important it is to understand that selfish people are not always accustomed to be the doer of all bad, instead at times possibly emerging from such aspects of existence that pertains to them being victimised instead across different levels of mental awareness. It’s easy to view selfishness as a culprit rather than as victim for we believe it to be an inherent nature of the bads to emerge in all assertions negative, and that indeed is what has driven certain aspects of ‘normal’ human behavior like this that forms our purview of exploration today to such generalisations rather unfancied. The need to cut some slack in this respect though becomes easier to understand when we view selfishness in such terms that make it possible to be emergent out of rather undesirable facets of life itself. While individuals with perfectly healthy upbringing and in adequately normal environments might still grow to harbour different intensities of this somewhat toxic trait, selfishness is also as likely to develop among such people who have had a restrained access to what generally sum up a good life. Whether it be in experiencing feelings of loneliness or unwantedness or in such invalidation of them throughout their lives that saw them neglected in both their physical essence and in emotional existence, selfish people might end up developing this certain behavior conditioned in fact by the less than selfless appreciation of them- or even the appalling lack of it altogether.

the joy of me book
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Half of the bad rep that selfishness has acquired perhaps is more to such understanding of it that limits it to being an exclusive exploration of the self. Because selfishness is made to shape up in such awareness that values oneself excessively over others, it unknowingly sits on such judgements in biasness that believe that self valuation in equivalent to devaluing others. However that hardly tends to be the case. Just as selfishness itself even in all eminence of it as a vice rests still in assertions diversive of that view, even when slightly, so too it is necessary to encapsulate the multi faceted reality of practically every other awareness entailing to one and all of us. And it is in such realms of realisation that we might stumble upon discoveries surprising enough to jolt us out of our own stubbornly held belief in the utterly despicable nature of what shapes the selfish among us. Particularly with the not so discrete boundaries that the overtly negative view of selfishness accords to, merging therefore with associated ideas of the self held in much more desirability of them like self love or even with such concerns more accepted in their harbouring of both the likes and the dislikes as in such terms that present as self interest, the possibility that the human proclivity to come across as righteous is what has fanned the immense displeasure over the selfish notion is more than valid, and starkly revealing in that as well. Perhaps our negative take on selfishness is itself an arising out of our own negativity in judging, of mindlessly adhering to trails of thought that have been imposed upon us rather than us coming to develop them out of our reason and experience. Awarenesses as these manifest as even more potent ‘solutions’ to debunking the long continuing steeping of selfishness in the sins when we realise that it is in such assertions of self love that also make the cut as selfish behavior that we might come to rear utter selflessness instead. As paradoxical as it might present a notion in relevance, it in fact is in deliberately choosing to love our own selves first that we tend to further the aspiration we hold of loving others. And in such contexts of love flowing in profusion first from us and only therefrom to the world that might very well pass off as selfishness rests our half informed, prejudiced intention of moulding our beliefs in conformity with the expectations set by others.

In such confounding biases across which selfishness asserts itself in contrary indeed to its perception as a profound plaguing of individuals in their souls and character and being alike, one thing therefore can be safely inferred- that there exists no singular catering to which the selfish behavior absolutely corresponds in all empirical evidence. As ridiculous as it might sound, selfishness can also be healthy outside its generally held ambits of the toxic. In the same vein therefore, an allusion to the selfish trait might emerge sometimes as even necessary over the deriding of it as absolutely unnecessary and unwanted. For something as lashed out as the supposed sense and sensibilities sans which selfishness spans its menacingly evil web of perpetuating only such interests synonymous with the utterings of the self, this is only a natural stint of behavior that humans perhaps need to embrace in certain intentions of it.