Why jealousy arises and how to deal with it

Why Jealousy Arises and How to Deal with It

From the very beginning of human existence, two important feelings arose – love and jealousy. Two completely opposite qualities are eternal companions of human relationships. But what does jealousy mean and why does it arise in relationships?

Of course, you must have come across a feeling of jealousy. It can be described as follows: it seems to a person that a soulmate shows more attention, care, and love towards someone else. Jealous one begins to feel helpless, unnecessary, and lonely. Jealousy arises to a loved one, which is difficult to overcome on their own.

Fear of loss and self-esteem – that is what formed the basis of jealousy. It is believed that it originated in ancient times. People who lived in tribes were forced to defend their territory and people. Moreover, the jealousy of men was based on the fact that they wanted to protect themselves from raising someone else’s offspring. The female sense of ownership arose because the ladies didn’t want to share their men with anyone and dreamed that all the men’s resources would be directed only to them.

But before you learn the reasons of jealousy, check out these good date ideas for winter and forget about boredom in relationships.

Why are we jealous?

1. Inferiority complex

If someone says that the jealous person has low self-esteem, then he or she will be right. But it is worth noting that these people can feel their inferiority both consciously and on a subconscious level. Most often this manifests itself in the following moments: “He/she can find more interesting than me,” “He is attracted to long-legged beauties,” “She can go to a wealthy man,” and so on.

2. Past life

If one of the partners had marriages or a long relationship before, then in family life with a jealous person, conflicts will often arise. For example, a jealous partner will not miss a moment to reproach a loved one for past love and will immediately remind of a long relationship with an ex. 

3. Fear of loneliness

A person doesn’t want to be alone, doesn’t know how to be alone and doesn’t know what to do with that. Such people didn’t find their place in life and the partner became the meaning of their existence. They are jealous because are afraid to lose them. Satisfying their needs, they feel significant. As soon as they remain alone, they feel a personal failure.

4. Specific scenario

People have a certain attitude and, unconsciously, they seek to lose it in a relationship with partners. For example, such an attitude: all men cheat on their women. For this attitude to be lost, a woman either finds a man who is madly in love with her or constantly suspect him in something.

5. Fear of losing

The psychology of each person at a subconscious level lays in thought that if a loved one is nearby, it should be so all the time. Negative thoughts that he or she can leave provoke jealousy, which sometimes destroys a relationship.

6. Love

If the heart is filled with love, then jealousy will also be present. Here we are not talking about the fact that people feel uncertain. When you experience deep emotions, jealousy is a defensive reaction, which at this stage of the relationship, is not something stupid or meaningless.

Psychologists say that not all people can be jealous of their partners Sometimes partners don’t understand the seriousness of feelings or have an overestimated self-esteem. For them, jealous of a loved one is something wrong. At the same time, it is noted that jealousy is inherent in every adult, but the level of its manifestation is different.