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The real life trope of the ‘wife guy’

wife guy

For an idea that largely seems transcending of the popular chauvinist tendency to look down upon wives and women as being someone mostly in relation to their husband, the rather modern ‘identity’ of the wife guy alluding makes for a curious case along this traditionally continuing pattern of societal existence. But it also is in this mode of its dramatic defying of a long standing standard set down as a very universal norm in conforming to the also traditional understanding of the husband- wife relationship analogy that this concept of very new age leanings has emerged instead to be more governed by the disappointing drift of the ‘too good to be true’ rendition.

It might emerge therefore to be as dynamic a case in disappointment- this notion of the wife guy not exactly eulogised as such but still coming to reside in a rosy portrayal of the promises very much within the reach of the realities to instead pass off as yet another ‘trend’ in ‘women exploitation’ in all the complicated nuances of what drives this rather urban display in doting husbandness- whatever that means. Seemingly defying a trope of real life but coming instead to dwell in the cruder essence of it, and quite appallingly as well, would be these modern day men not shying away from taking upon themselves an assertion deriving from their wives very prominent but sadly not so much unscheming even when not in all consciousness of the purity of their deep love for their better indeed halves.

The exact interpretation of what this ‘wife guy’ breed of men stands for is not very difficult to fathom. As the very term suggests, these are men harbouring an overwhelming almost affection for their wives whom they believe to the absolute and the best across all aspects of their existence. Not any less overwhelming would be the apparent ‘attempts’ at displaying of their immense fondness for these women of worth, ironically though in a manner manifesting more in the worthiness of the males who further such behavior in exaggeration. The premise is perplexing and sure one that would earn us some lashings in our supposed seeking to deride this ultimate prevalence of the recognition that women have always deserved but only rarely received. But even in the face of all such clamour characterising the charisma of these guys visibly enamored by the love of their lives, whether or not they indeed feel that way from the deepest core of their heart, the underlying nature of this rather recent phenomenon in emergence is one feeding off still on the patterns established through the times.

Interestingly, the real life origins of the wife guy both in the nomenclature of it and in the actual existence of them might be as recent to not enough command yet a decade’s measure of standing. References of them in popular culture though precede times of contemporary occurrence, encountered particularly in years summing up the turn of the century, pointing thus to the idea of them floating about in the collective psyche for quite some time though they had not really managed to make inroads into the more physical structure of the world. Or perhaps they might have had already, in sparing instances of identity not however as dictating of their terms in fancy nor uttering in as much assertion their fawning over the amazingness of their wives, granting them therefore the passing off their nature in greater ignorance.

As a real world concept therefore, wife guys haven’t actually been the find of the century. But the amusing name of their kind sure is, erupting as it did in the form of a digital derivation in keeping up with the times in much authenticity. Not surprisingly, given the frivolous nature of this identity notwithstanding the ‘validating’ greatness of it, the term wife guy found first expression in the universally popular domain of the internet memes. That is a drive down through time to the year of 2016 and followed upon by similar references in the subsequent couple of years but it wouldn’t be until the definite dawn of 2019 that the definition of ‘wife guy’ would come to stick in as much definiteness as well.

Penetrating thus the realms of the cultural as a phenomenon that came to receive more curious attention and went on to being more deliberately pursued would be this particular prospect in immense lovingness surpassing even the equally striking understanding of what would be commanded by the ‘uxorious’ description. Wife guys tend to be ‘unnaturally’ devoted to the essence of their woman in all her admirable worth and as devoted as well to the equally evident idolising of them. No wonder this image in conjuring the typical version of wife guys would bring to the minds of even those not otherwise aware of this new emergence in all exactness the most popular celebrity reference of an exclusive Will Smith gesture in ‘showing off’ his almost obsession with wife Jada Pinkett Smith in all her person. And it exactly is this mode of conveyance of the wife guy identity that makes for the problematic premise of the principle summing up this peculiar perception in prevalence.

Source: Vogue

Perhaps the parlance to which the wife guy ‘personality’ adheres would have made for a case in some positivity if not for the sad truth of what it professes. Within the most characteristic unfurling of this idea of a husband as doting and loving and supportive as can be manifests almost an agenda hiding in plain sight. Because in all their call for attention upon the wife and even in all their exaltation of them, what the wife guy trope ends up in is a loop intricately linked to the very pathetic expression of the patriarchal. A deliberation upon the view perpetrated by men in this manner a la the Will Smith style of presenting indeed the lady to the world even when she is a definite identity in her own right is but a further submission to the sad image of what has long been reducing wives to something as material as trophies. And that in part is because of the conviction with which wife guys go about displaying their amazement at their wife, hyping them up no doubt but not concentrating for once on the real essence of them.

Wife guys then can be absolutely seen in a light of all such sources substantially shallow- in their showcasing of an effort to bring attention upon their wives, what they actually aim for is a covetion for the nature of their own selves, of being that man of the modern times totally up for the ideas of whatever it is that grants women their due. Whether that due is only expected to be returned in the form of greater recognition of the man instead makes for a different matter in the essaying of their worth.

During the time when it went about gaining greater attention on social media, this whole taking upon their wives by men as professing (read public displaying) of their love emerged to be almost a movement in showing off the extent to which these guys are devoted to their lady love. And with good reason as well- feeding on as they do their own ego in a desire for recognition by something exclusively availing to the merits of their partner but which they skillfully maneuver as their own through such deceptive tactics in presentation that make this whole thing all about their own selves.

The premise though might seem perplexing at first. With wife guys simultaneously praised and mocked for being a bit too obsessed with their wives, this whole experiment in fanning the fancies can come across as a whole hearted desire on the part of the man to indeed laud their better half. But with such underlying notions continuing from the deepest trenches of the male superiority that society has so long been furthering and the wife guy phenomenon presents as yet another half hearted attempt at actually celebrating women and more in decimating their individualistic identity to the extent of them emerging to be the wife of someone. Throw in all their impeccable achievements and extraordinary qualities in to the mix and the result is one even validating of the male ego- of getting to call someone that much perfect as ‘their’ wife.

And yet wife guys find eulogising and exaltation and furthering to extents even greater than what they had ‘wanted’ for their wives, only further establishing thus the problematic nature of availing for themselves what they made the world believe they cherished for their wives. In fact so impactful would be the behavior and nature and image of the men practising this sort of behavior in all public view that they would all but erase the very existence of the wife herself. Regressive thus a notion to the point that does not even concern in any manner the woman in context, apart from her allowing the recurring reference of being indeed the wife and letting assume therefore the corresponding existence of the husband far greater a reality than herself, given how all that there is to be done is done indeed by the man is the wife guy revelation that tends to be a greater ‘non husband’ instead.

Very definite a trend in social media in its very basis out of this platform as far as the identification of it as a definite category of men is concerned and therefore understandably not so much a personal ’cause’ in belief as it is a case of profile build up, the whole wife guy plot only makes use of the wife relation to make known in fact the opposite partner of the pair. In such ambiguity of the wife even in her very existence let alone in such aspects of identity that transcend the form of the physical and accrues instead to her thoughts and beliefs and views and opinions as an individual, the wife guy assertion through which she comes across as nothing other than a wife is just the perfect ploy for centuries and millennia and age old agenda of ‘man’kind to continue with even greater conviction.

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