Friendship is insane. It’s your safe space- where you can cuddle your hearts out and cry your eyes off at the same time. You lose all inhibitions and there is nothing anything very personal about you. You don’t mind losing yourself to that one person who you know genuinely cares about how you feel and still will be by your side even when you wouldn’t think you deserve to have them there.
There’s a reason friendship sounds so much like everything you would want to hold on in life. All those affection that streams out even when you are mad at each other, all the cribbings you can let out without any hesitation, those shared moments and memories- friends let you add more preciousness to the delightful beauty that life encompasses.
Not surprisingly therefore, it’s not very uncommon that people tend to hold on to friends as someone being the elixir of their life. While ‘best friends forever’ might be only a phrase for some, people who have been blessed enough to discover souls with whom they bond much like their own know well and sure just how much emotion the BFF cult imbibes unto them.
But if friendship is so very pertinent to enjoy life in all its glory, why do we always seek out someone (else) to have someone by our side all the time? Someone like a life partner or a romantic buddy with whom we intend to fall deeply and madly in love with. Wouldn’t friends be enough for us to trudge along life in all of the certainties and the unseens?
They indeed would be. Which explains why so many people seek out friendship over love even in marriages. So if you can’t marry your bestfriend, why not make the one you marry as good as being your bestie?
There has always been love in friendships. You wouldn’t bond with someone you at least don’t particularly like. That’s how crucial liking someone is essential to forging a tie with them. Over time as you progress into better friends, you also discover the liking proceeding into a stronger love- one that you might yearn even life long.
However, it has not always been true the other way round. Because marriages have more been a matter of societal pressure and personal ‘requirements’ that any other consideration wasn’t allowed to transcend into matter of greater importance.
Or a friendly romance?
Of course, marriages have always required compatibility. Because in no probability, any relationship can survive without some basic level of trust and respect. But a free flowing bond had never been particularly encouraged, especially in arranged marriages. Not that society have had anything for or against friendship in conjugality, but marital bliss has rarely been interpreted in terms pertaining to the greater goal of friendly pursuits.
Expectedly so. At a time when romantic alliances were decided not by the persons expected to romance, but rather by their families, you wouldn’t expect them to think of things as far as friendship. Not that it would have been any realistic to do so. Because you just can’t know which two people might click with or be set off by one another.
But as times have progressed and people tend to settle now not for the mere need of it but rather because they want to, it’s obvious that you will want things to pan out fine with your partner. Whether it be romance doing wonders over friendship or even being friends setting the precedent, in a age where personal well being and happiness are utterly important, it’s undoubtedly compelling for folks to be searching for the ultimate contentment and happiness in every relationship whatsoever.
Friendship as the communicator
Friendship in marriage however is essential not only for the mere comfort of it. It would indeed be awkward to live with someone, presumably your whole life, if you don’t even know what kind of person they are. Being friends with your significant other lets you explore their desires and individuality more, that in turn fosters a healthy communication. Ultimately because communication serves as the vital key to unsettling each of life’s misunderstood musings.
Friendship as the ‘no- judge’ hassle
Foremost among such miscommunication is very often the past life of your partner. Whether you are the ‘cool’ girlfriend or boyfriend or the more judgemental one, chances are that previous affairs of your spouse might leave you a bit uneasy. As a friendly soul however, if you manage to build that connection with your partner that will let you have access to all of his past doings and relationships, your chances of troubling yourself with those burden of days gone would be relievingly minimised.
Friendship helps you stay sane
Also being friends over lovers does not let you get too cheesy with your relationship. That’s very healthy, considering that too much of affection can in fact ruin your marriage. Too much of anything has always been bad, and when it’s something as fleeting as human feelings, things tend to go awry very soon.
Friendship brings balance
Being friends with your partner is also vital in that it does much to let your relation sparkle continuously. There’s nothing very boring when you have a great friend around. Because you can be goofy with them or indulge in the deepest talks, there’s hardly any scope of extremes messing things up.
Beyond the honeymoon phase, marriages don’t seem anything like a dream. They are more a tryst with reality, that can be tided over comfortably with your best friend by your side.
Friends because, love is good but friendship is better
Getting mushy with bae is romantic no doubt. But isn’t a day out with your bestie more appealingly versatile? Because life is more about fun and frolic that it becomes important to be friends with your love.
You will always adore the person who makes your life infinitely better. That way, you don’t ever have to worry about love fading away from your life. And if friends with benefits is such a ‘cool’ thing to be, you might as well benefit by being friends with your partner!