The curious couple case for sleep divorce

Delicate bonds of what sustain such feels as intensely upbeat as love or as evocative as the concerns of care, relationships indeed are very fragile modes of living for humankind. And yet, they are all that there can be to find support, love and togetherness in for a life worthy of continuing despite all its associated hardships. Building relations outside the trajectory driven by a shared blood lineage or those that are not of a familial nature to begin with, rather working out to that end through their passing in time, is no less than an art- and one that requires dedication as well at that. They tend to be rather vulnerable as well, these ties that vow to bind individuals together in all encompassments of their imperfect human identity are also as susceptible to being ravaged by even the most inconsequential of conflicts, the most trivial of misunderstandings can sabotage even seemingly healthy relationships just like that. And while that is true for virtually every single relation you come to live life through, it is more pronounced a shaky premise on which romances come to dwell.

Romantic relationships tend to be even more fickle in nature. Not in the sense of being hollow promises of lofty standards based out of the non existent desire for forever but in bringing together two individuals of completely unrelated identities for them to spend a lifetime with each other. Sure, they might be the most compatible in their shared ideals of some of life’s most worthiest musings, harbour similar aspirations in humanness and further identical pursuits of living life to the fullest. And sure, that is all that matters as well, as they would say. And thus, they embark on to live their lives together in all love and hope, more than excited to proceed along this journey of what they anticipate as one of bliss with understanding and respect and trust and of course love abundantly gushing throughout their lovely bond of what identifies them as the made for each other couple. But despite all such enviable indeed prospect of what their relationship harbours, this madly in love couple who have been newly proclaimed as man and wife, or man and man or wife and wife if you so please, discover to their utter horror the absolute torture that it is to physically live with each other. For indeed, even in all their unwavering loyalty and unconditional love, the lovebirds can not absolutely make- do with all of their annoyance once the real test of life takes over. Even in such amusing but more than significant assertions of living in all sighs and snores, the deep seated anguish of humankind finds expression as a raging intolerance for what are but exquisitely natural callings upon man.

Sleeping together is something that couples ‘normally’ do because this simple, almost effortless act in togetherness has been established to do wonders indeed for relationships. From providing each other solace to boosting the sense of securing while reinstating indeed their existence in togetherness for the whole of their lives, sleeping together is a deeply intimate realisation for every relationship. Pertaining to such folds of intimacy of both the physical and emotional kind, this very comforting fore of what cuddling up close to your love one means both for your well being and for the happy continuation of relationships is therefore a universal exploration. But take into consideration such assertions of sleeping patterns and behavior of your partner that distract your own to extremes and in essential regularity as well and you would know that this elixir of happiness can easily translate into being the recipe for disaster instead.

The sleeping habits of others can be tremendously offsetting to our own pursuance of that night long period in an almost trance like existence. Sleep being so vital to life functions even outside the purview of the relationship kind, it is no wonder that a good night’s sleep is a luxury that we all wish to afford in utter peace. But if this essential most pursuit of life is disturbed by such external forces, even when it happens to be the person you love the most, that it compromises the duration and quality of your optimum experience of sleep, then things sure will go haywire. Whether that be a disturbance caused by involuntary actions of your sleep partner, say excessive tossing and turning in bed or even worse assertions of snoring or sleepwalking or sleep speaking or habitual adherences to such behavior as late night texting or sleeping with the lights on and numerous such possibilities, the resultant toll on the other partner and the relationship between them can be seriously affected.

On the rise therefore are such cleverly thought out attempts of salvaging both peace of mind and fullness of heart that entails living life in all fulfilment. Making for a much sought out tactic specifically pertaining to the relationship realm today is this arrangement worked out between couples mutually in what is understood as a sleep divorce. With its very assertion already making evident what this novel indeed settlement tends to be and from our already well established dialogue giving away its premise of being, this concept of sleep divorce should not require much elucidation. It indeed is agreeing to mutually coexist with each other very much as a romantically inclined couple, with no love lost as well but choosing to do so by attending to their individual requirements of sleep through such measures that are exclusive to each. Whether that be such pointers of separate sleeping as different beds or different sleep times as suit the requirements of either or even the leap of sorts made in charting out the soundness of sleep in different rooms altogether, sleep divorce indeed is what is universally helping couple maintain their sanity and the relationship simultaneously while shunning even the universally agreed upon ‘relationship referendum’ of shared sleep.

The benefits of a sleep divorce as in what it does or does not to relationships can be somewhat ambiguous. That is because the idea of relationships are unique to every couple and what works as perfectly fine for someone might not be as flawless an exploration rooted for by others. But in helping one maintain the correct sleep hygiene for a healthy, happy, optimal experience of sleep, sleep divorce definitely helps by having one consciously cancel out disruptive sleep elements. That can indirectly bode well for every relation you hold by improving the overall quality of your life and keeping you in good spirits, energetic and happy and focussed. Sleep divorces also might be helpful in that they prevent your relationship from going down the wrong path even when they otherwise might or might not hold much accountability in repairing relations. The more crucial matter that holds the key to separate sleep being a boon or bane for your relationship depends on your approach towards it. It of course is only natural to feel irritated when all you have been able to afford is continuous bouts of interrupted sleep and more so when it is one induced by the nocturnal disturbances brought upon by your partner. But maintaining still a reasonable tone and a justified approach in suggesting to go your own separate ways as far as sleep is concerned is very important particularly when the very term includes a volatile indeed reference of the dubious divorce distinction.

The route to sleep divorce can though emerge to be even contentious particularly since it might involve the stigma of being ridiculed by society. That itself can brew trouble between couples with the very suggestion of trying out sleeping separately acting as a trigger in potentially jeopardising relationships. The ‘ominous’ reference to divorce already fitting the negative bill, this prospect perched precariously upon the stumbling blocks of sleep can in fact be the cause for resentment finding a stronghold over love in even the most mature of relationships. The trick therefore lies in being as frank and yet as considering as possible when you strike up this conversation with your partner in the first place. Honesty indeed is essentially at the core of every relationship and maintaining its dignity across any issue or trouble is one of the most important relationship rules to follow. It perhaps would be more appropriate therefore if you set out pitching your suggestion in clear terms without however alluding to its essence in identity. Only once you have achieved a favourable enough ground of working that is viable enough to dawn upon your partner in reasonable assertions and not in outright offensiveness that it would make sense to let them in on the defining identity of it. Or even chucking out that part altogether can be not any far from the truth in what you stated but refrained only from labelling. Life and relationships both are only as complex as we tend to make out of them and going about them in some conscious assertion of reality is the way forward to emerge a winner in either. All while uncompromising with the essential pursuits of what sums it all up, in both biological and emotional essence of living the good life.