All for love: charms of the ‘surprise’ in dating


Be it blinds or speeds, seems like dating is more fun when there has been attached to it a factor of curiosity. This intrigue in meeting someone for the first time that essentially sums up blind dates could be as necessary an element of the more organised notion of speed dating. In either case therefore, the way the dates turn up as pleasurable experiences or complete disasters would be as open-ended in their possible happening which to be frank is what sustains the peculiar excitement around such concepts of love, of course not per se.

Speed dating specifically seems to be a more current-fit devising of dating strategy. The very idea of speeding through encounters with potential dates might be seemingly more suited to the current day constricted awareness of time by the never unengaged human. But speed dating surely is older than blind dating and definitely more certain as well. The mode of its occurring through a formalized matchmaking process could be an attribute to some informal events that trended around in the 19th century even when the earliest documented practice as such would only date to the more recent year of 1996. Contrast that to blind dating prevailing at least as a term since the early 1920s and the premise of this dual dwelling spans as one of rather interesting dimension.

speed dating event
Source: MeetMindful

The ‘promise’ held by speed dating might strike as being more expansive in its avenue of truth. The arrangement being one that requires you to devote only some few minutes of your time to everyone lined up in that route waiting to be sped by, speed dating seems indeed like the no-nonsense approach to dating. One doesn’t even have to bear up with someone they find obnoxious through the entirety of the date, which to be exact would emerge in this case as being only a trial in dating rather than actually adhering to the dating description.

Blind dating would offer a different version of what romantic beginnings can probably occur as. The more definite socialisation involving only two specific individuals in any particular episode of happening might seem to emanate vibes of more seriousness. But the intent in any case would be the same- to determine with whom and if at all they indeed are romantically compatible with someone they can consider thus for future engaging.

Upon such grounds of their emergence that unfolds as legit spaces of interaction for personal lives to blossom, both blind dating and speed dating have long found acceptance as being amongst the many other dynamics of what constructs a structure in romantic seeking. Blind dates would be encouraged in fact in some countries as part of the traditional setup in pre matrimonial processing. Speed dates on the other hand would not be so much societal in their nature but they are validated as being prominent considerations in the organised dating scene.

blind dating
Source: The Guardian

Of course each one of these avenues of exploring would be as faulty and at the same time only as perfect as the other. Because like everything about love that strikes only the lucky hearts of the world, dates too harbour their enormous share of highs and lows. Regarding both in equal ‘respect’ of what they can lead to, the novelty rested in concepts like blind dates and speed dates can be exciting or exhausting in what they ultimately makes one experience.

The blindness of dates implies that none of the parties involved know the other prior to the meeting and are most often set-up by some mutual person on basis of their judgement or even in mere hope of seeing them together. The speed quotient of dates would be accounted for by meeting multiple persons one after the other usually as part of an organised event, each attended to in a set duration of time and eventually making the ‘pick’ from the lot after all the participants have been met. Blind dates would be much casual while speed dates might find interpretation as more formal a course of romance but the underlying intention generally isn’t any different.

Blind dates are exciting indeed if only for the sheer prospect of not knowing who you are meeting. In that spectrum of consideration, speed dating can be even more exciting in meeting up with different people. Consider however the other extent of what this can mean and speed dates might then end up taxing you more than a blind date if the encounter happens with someone one do not really vibe with.

Interesting therefore is the fact that despite such equivalences or otherwise of these two concepts, they can also be mutually exclusive of the other. Going on a date with someone you have previously speed dated wouldn’t count as blind dating even when one might have practically no knowledge whatsoever of the one they are seeing. More confusing can be such criteria of blind dating that favours no prior exchange to have occurred even if that takes place over texts and online conversations. And while speed dating too would be more favourable a romantic possibility without the involvement of friends, the prevalence of parallel concepts like speed friending can quite obscure the dating definitions of it.

Both of these trails of romantic fantasies though would still converge in quite considerableness, as has been universally and even scientifically established. A very prominent feature that flows through this narrative of finding love is one of subconscious but significant identity. The notion of first impression being the last impression is very predominantly dictating this sphere of possible love which might not therefore give romance a fair chance at even sparking.

The extent to which the dormant considered specifics of the human arising come to dictate affairs of its heart proves to specifically relevant when it comes to dating upon first chances. Physical attributes of what we might not even know that we desire emerges as deciding factors in such cases even when there also would be a fair chance at innate personalities to unfurl the characteristic charm. With everything from desirable connotations of height and age or style and looks and mannerisms scrutinised as syncing or not with personal preferences, the romanticness of character does not quite take centerstage the way one might expect it to.

There might be more to these sensations of perceiving that makes the exciting element of such dating. Whether one chooses to evoke the emotions of that standing or radiates it as part of their self, the influences still exert in arousing interest of the olfactory. Alternatively, it can be a dissolution of interest composing the reality as folks who aren’t particularly conversant in their approach with strangers would know indeed. The intensity of such awkwardness though can be offset and the hopes of romance thus advanced, if the one you meet up with proves to be quite a delight in their social and emotional intelligence.

online blind speed dating
Source: TikTok

In any given context or situation, the certainty would not be exclusive indeed in what would be availed out of a spree in dating or in a single case of such practise. Blind dates ease the pressure in terms of a complete unfamiliarity since one would have a mutual acquaintance. The guarantee of course isn’t ultimate but there exists a fair chance of untowardness being averted in most encounters.

The speed dating arrangement cannot be proclaimed always in such curation of convenience but what it does aid is the physical process of dating. Because going on first dates is quite an affair in having to consider, if not fuss over one’s presentableness in person, having the option of going through multiple routes leading to the same end cuts out quite some of the recurring stress in this regard.

Speed dating however would be more a matter of chance than the wholly blind operation. Blind dates allow for the luxury to getting to know the potential partner in being not constrained by time. They can therefore flow in more organic a manner of conversing and exploring and understanding. And while the end that one settles for to consider after the methodical meandering across the arena of speed dating could be as elaborative, there might be less scope in the initial rounds of more presumability.

The specific minutes within which impressions are made in irreversibility almost during a speed dating ‘binge’ holds greater girth in not being representative of realness. The blindness of what construes then notions in blind dating can in fact find itself disadvantaged in its coming to assume also a certain interpretation in speed dates.

In each of their emergence and occurring as practices of the 1900s carried over through the turn of the century and the millennium at once, both blind dates and speed dates might be regarded in a lesser status of relevance. But that the charm of them manifests still is evident from the transcending of their identity. Even when people still go on dates the traditional way, blind dating and speed dating also have asserted as ‘innovative’ modes of online dating. Many dating apps today boast of such features that curate the longstanding ideals of what such attempts at romance explore. So if you are a modern avatar searching for love with whatever intention on one of those many applications that have made businesses out of hearty desires or identify as an old school sucker for romance, experiencing the high of blind dating or ‘binge’ dating strangers could be perhaps the best bet at relationshipping you might ever have had!